Matchmaking 101
by superstrawberryL
Summary: Tension is in the air and it's not the battle of wits L and Light are thinking of. Luckily for them, there's one matchmaker out there that's willing to help them confess their "feelings" for each other. Sadly, that involves her sadistic schemes. LxLight


**Sorry for the long wait! Happy birthday to me! :D **

**Summary:**

**Meet L, loner detective just in need of some love. (Childhood) and socially deprived, he thinks he may have found 'the one', 'the only': Kira, aka, Light Yagami.**

**Now meet Light Yagami, psycho with a God complex, in need of some attention. Manipulative and somewhat kind-hearted (ha!), he's found his perfect match that could possibly outwit him: L. **

**While both think, no, **_**know**_**, there's a rivalry between the two, a clash of wits, a cat and mouse game causing some tension, **_**someone**_** can smell a different kind of tension: love. Said person decides to rid of the (sexual) tension, by re-creating a scenario after scenario to get them to confess to each other. **

**This could work, right? **

**Confession of love or insanity.**

**Whichever comes first. **

**Welcome to Matchmaking 101 where your "cupid" is either schizophrenic/has multiple personality disorder and you can't tell what's worse: her hard-core yaoi obsession or her ****nutty, hair-brained, insane****, schemes. **

**0o0o0o0o0o0**

I sat, drumming my fingers along the desk, waiting for the trio as I stared at the monitors in the pitch black room.

"When are they coming? I thought they were supposed to be here ten minutes ago," I huffed and spun around in my chair, my eyes closing. Cruelty was my specialty and most people associated me with the definition of sadism. So why was I wasting my time on these people?

"Nii-chan, are they here yet?" I hear a quiet voice come from behind me. I almost shit in my pants as I practically flew from my chair to under the confines of my desk.

"Holy shit! Don't creep up on me like that." I was sadistic, but I never said I wasn't a scaredy cat. Or a liar.

"You said they would be here," the voice quietly growled. I felt a sharp, cold object prod my back. I shuddered, not wanting to turn around unless I wanted a pierced lung. Honestly, I wanted both of my lungs. Both functioning, thank you very much, have a nice day.

"T-they're coming, o-okay?" I attempt to make peace, shielding my head from any attacks soon to come.

"They better be here, Nii-chan or else—oh look. They've arrived," the voice notices. I cautiously peer from my hiding spot to the monitor that gave the view of the front door. I saw a group of six walk up to the door, four looking bored out of their minds while one looked excited and another looked like crapping in their pants.

"Come on, Light!" Misa begs, pulling Light and L up to the door, the latter being chained to the former, and thus having no choice but to follow along. Since Misa doesn't go anywhere without her loyal puppy, aka, Matsuda, he tailed along too. Who else would keep Matsuda out of trouble besides Aizawa and Soichiro, who tagged along too? Perfect.

"Well, Aizawa and Soichiro were a bit unexpected, but we could have fun with them too, right Nii-chan?" the voice asked, as I felt the knife point graze across the back of my neck.

"S-s-shit! Stop with that knife!" I snapped, as the weight of the knife left my neck and the coward in me hid back under the desk and soon I heard the slamming of the door. I gave a sigh of relief and sat back in the chair, focusing back into the conversation the group was having.

"Misa-chan, why are we going here?" L asked in his usual boring monotone voice, raven eyes looking around the house.

"Because Misa wants Light and Misa to go on a date here!" Misa exclaims, throwing her arms up in the air. "It's perfect! I heard from my friend who heard from someone else that this house has been abandoned for years and anyone who's gone in never comes out," Misa explains as everyone looks at the house. I notice a flash of guilt sweep across Matsuda's face and suddenly shift into one of scared-ness.

"Why don't they come out?" Matsuda asks.

"Who knows? I heard it's because the ghost or monster comes and gets them," Misa smiles creepily gaining a freaked out face from Matsuda before cackling with laughter. "I'm just joking Matsui. Ghosts don't really exist," Misa attempts to calm Matsuda down.

"R-really?" Matsuda stuttered. I scoffed. What an idiot.

"Of course not Matsuda," Light assured trying to keep Misa from humping his arm.

"So does that mean we can do in, Light? Can we? Can we? Can we? Please?" Misa pouted, making her look even worse. Brat.

"Misa! Cut it out with all this lovey dovey crap!" Aizawa shouted, looking like he wanted to strangle the teen idol as Soichiro held him back. I snickered at the afro man. He's probably on his man period again or he wasn't getting laid enough by his wife. Or by Matsuda. Or by Soichiro.

Light sighed and ran his hand through his hair. As always. "Fine. We'll go in, look around, and come back out, okay Misa?" Light offered, trying to make peace between the two.

"Fine," Misa huffed as they all entered the house one by one, except for Matsuda. He looked around the house one more time.

"Matsuda!" I hear come from inside and Matsuda slowly made his way behind the others, closing the door behind him. Let the fun begin! I put on my headset and tapped the microphone.

"Testing, one two three. Ao Oni, ready?" I spoke quietly into the headset. I messed around with some controls and soon all three of the monitor screens were filled with views of different rooms around the house thanks to the cameras I set up earlier.

"Ready."

"Midori Oni should be joining us shortly." My eyes flick around the monitors and I locate the group in the foyer of the house.

"Right-o, Noir puppeteer."

"Did you lock the front door?"

"…What do you think?"

"I see. Commence operation…"

"This house looks better on the inside, right Light?" Misa admires, looking around.

"Hmm," he replies, looking bored as always, as his calculating eyes scan the house. A set of stairs lead upwards to another level and there was a door opposite of where they came in. A hallway to his left led to more doors and turned a corner, while the hall to his right led to a longer hallway and more doors.

"C-can we get out of here now?" Matsuda asks. "I suddenly have a bad feeling about this place."

"Scared, Matsuda?" Aizawa taunts.

"N-n-no."

"So why don't we explore the next level?" Misa asks, pointing up the stairs as she slowly starts walking towards the set.

"Now!"

In camera frame, I see Ao Oni break a plate in the kitchen, chuckle then quietly tip toe out the back door of the kitchen, locking it from the outside.

"Did you hear that?" Soichiro asks, looking around as he, Aizawa, and Matsuda inch closer to the door.

"Let's get out of here, guys," Matsuda whines, as he attempts to open the front door. "H-h-hey! The door! I-I-I-it won't open!" Matsuda tries again, pressing his foot to the wall as the attempts to force the door open.

"I think that sound came from down there," L states, pointing down the right hallway. "Come, Light-kun," L tugs the chain connecting the two detectives. "We'll be right back to help with the door. Everyone stay here."

"Be careful, Ryuzaki," Soichiro warns as Light and L walk down the hallway.

"Stage one: Complete. Enter stage two. Ao Oni, go!" I whisper loudly. I then see Ao Oni run down the stairs, big blue head bobbing.

"It's raping time!" Ao shouts, running after whoever it could get its blue hands on. There's a high pitched scream, coming from either Misa or Aizawa, and the small group breaks up separately trying to avoid Ao. Ao settles on chasing Matsuda as he runs up the stairs, attempting to avoid the monster tailing him.

"Nice job, Ao. Keep chasing him. I'll tell you when to commence stage three."

"Come back!" Ao bellows as a sign of understanding.

"MOMMY!" Matsuda squeals, running around the hallways. I chuckle and turn my attention back to the sexually frustrated detectives- ahem, I mean, L and Light.

"Huh. It's just a plate," Light states as L sits in that special way of his and examines the plate shards.

"Hmm. It appears so," L states, grabbing two of the shards, keeping one in his pocket and handing the other to Light. Light tilts his head to the side, confused. "Just in case," L responds. "Let's go back to the others." L gets up and starts to shuffle towards the hallway again.

"L, wait," Light says, grabbing L's wrist. I could feel my cheeks start to burn and light trickles of blood come down my nose. I grabbed a tissue and started watching the two like they were- no, they _are_ a soap opera.

"What Light-kun?" L answered coldly, black eyes empty. He glanced down at Light's grip on his wrist, slowly pulling his hand away.

"What? What's up with you? You've barely spoken to me since we've gotten here," Light argued quietly, a frown on his faced, eyebrows furrowed.

"And?"

"I want to know what's bothering you."

"Nothing," L replied, eyes downcast and concentrating on the hardwood flooring.

"Ryuzaki, don't lie to me," Light persisted, getting closer to the older man.

"Like you lied to me?" L asked quietly, turning to look into Light's eyes.

"Oh snap," I whispered, trying to stop my bloody nose with a handful of tissues.

"What?" Light whispers, a confused look flashing across his face.

L sighed. "Let's just get back to the others," he whispered, voice barely audible as Light stood in place.

"No, L. Let's not. I want to talk about this now, not later."

"Puppeteer!"

"Shh!"

"I don't know what you mean, Light-kun," L replied, playing dumb.

"You know what he's talking about Ryuzaki!" I yell into the microphone.

"NOIR!"

"EEP!" I scream as I hear Ao Oni's voice come from my head phones, blocking out the conversation Light and L were having.

"What?" I answer curtly.

"What happened to stage three?"

I sighed. "Light and L haven't gotten to the hallway yet. They're still talking in the kitchen."

"Can I chase them out?"

"No! It'll- wait. Yes. Go. Now. Quickly."

"Gotcha boss."

If Light and L confront each other now, what about the rest of the time they're here?

"L, I think I know what's going on."

"No you don't."

"It's because you're-"

"ABOUT TO GET RAPED!" Ao Oni yells as the green man enters the kitchen and slowly walks toward Light and L.

"W-w-w-what i-i-is that?" L stutters.

"I don't know, but I think we should RUN!" Light shouts, grabbing L's hand as they bolt out of the kitchen and down the hall, Midori, quickly running after them.

"AHHHH!" They both shout, running as fast as they could, Ao not too far behind.

"Try to find an open door!" L barks at Light as both of them go down the hall, jiggling doors.

"None of them want to open!" Light yells, as Midori comes closer. The two detectives run back into the foyer of where they started.

"Run, run, run, as fast as you can, I'll catch you because I can!~" Ao sings, skipping down the hall.

"What a horrible song," L snips, stopping in his tracks at the base of the stairs. "It doesn't rhyme, it's not catchy, somewhat annoying-"

"L!" Light shouts, grabbing L's hand and dragging him up the stairs as Ao follows.

"Corner them into the third floor bedroom, Ao." I order.

"…Why?"

"Because."

"…That's not an answer."

"Because you're obviously a part of the homosexual supporting cast and do not need such an important role."

"…otaku nerd…"

"Ah. Wonderful compliments to my ears."

"Quick, L, in here!" Light yells, as he manages to get the bedroom door that is oh so conveniently open. L bolts in and they both shut the door in Ao's face, Ao jiggling the door handle a few times before walking away.

"Step three and four: complete. What's next?"

"Come here and monitor the cameras. I need to go out and fix a camera on the first floor. Make sure Midori Oni doesn't do anything yet, okay?"

"You got it chief."

"What do you think that was?" Light asked, trying to catch his breath and slow his heart.

"I honestly don't know," L replied, doing the same. "I'll call Watari to get us out of here." He pulled his phone out of his pocket, flipping it open. L's usual monotone expression turned sour as he stared at his phone.

"What?" Light asked, peeking over at L.

"How fitting for a haunted house. There's no reception." L rolled his eyes and shut the phone. "It seems like we have to find our own way out ourselves."

"How? You saw that thing! We can only run from it," Light argued.

"We can fi-"

_THUMP_

"Shh," Light interrupted. "Do you hear that?"

"…Yes."

_THUMP THUMP THUMP_

Light and L looked simultaneously at the closet in the corner, then at each other before nodding. They crept over to the source of the thumping, and when they opened the closet-

"Aizawa!"

There was the task force's afro man, face slick with sweat just like his pants, shivering in the closet.

"What happened?" Light asked the elder man.

Aizawa didn't answer nor did he come out.

"I think we should get him some water," L suggested. He dragged Light over to the other door in the room and found a bathroom. L tried the faucet, but no water came out. "Strange. Pipes don't seem to work either," L noted. He and Light both turned to the closest thing involving water: the toilet.

"…Well, it is water…"

"…Never say where got the water, understood?" Light nodded and they gathered 'water' for Aizawa.

**(A/N: I DO NOT SUPPORT ANYONE DRINKING TOILET WATER! THIS IS PURELY FICTIONAL SO NO ONE DRINK TOILET WATER, OKAY!)**

The two detectives went back to the room to see Aizawa still in the closet.

L handed Aizawa the water and watched as he gulped it down, disgust written on the other two's faces.

"Thanks, I-I-I needed that." Aizawa smiled weakly before exiting the closet and flopping onto the bed.

"What happened?" Light asked, he and standing over Aizawa.

"T-t-that thing, found Matsuda, Chief, Misa and me, and chased after us. We all panicked and split up. I think it ran after Matsuda, poor guy, and I ran in here and locked myself in the closet. I don't know where Chief, Matsuda, or Misa is now.

"So…what now?"

"Yes, indeed…what now?" I grinned in the darkness, waiting for Ao. As soon as the words left my mouth, I heard a knock on the door. My grinned widened as I saw Midori enter.

"Well, aren't you a sight for sore eyes?" I smirked.

"Har de fucking har," Ao scoffed, settling down in the chair next to mine. "Have you got any news from Shiro?"

"Haven't heard a peep. Maybe Shiro is waiting for them in the piano room," I answered. I took of my head set and replaced it with a portable set. "What if they find me?"

"I'll tell you if someone's getting near," Ao assured me. "Go. My best estimate is that you have around ten minutes."

"No problem-o." I exited the room into the basement hallway. I squinted, my eyes trying to adjust to the bright lights. "Can you hear me, Ao-kun?" I whisper, walking up the stairs into the first floor.

"Why do you insist on calling me that?" I hear Ao from the other side. I chuckle, slowly opening the door as a crack of light hits my face. "You know I'm older than you!"

"You're just too much fun to tease!" I joke, opening the basement door wider. I stick my head out to check if the coast is clear. I exit out of the basement, closing the door behind me-

"Why are you here?" I hear a familiar voice ask. I get over my temporary heart attack to find Midori behind me.

"The camera near the front door is broken. I need to fix it." I answer. A looming shadow catches my eye and suddenly I feel as if I've been hit by speeding train. I get thrown on said train's shoulder and start feeling nauseous as Mr. Train-man starts running. "Oof!" I see Midori getting smaller and smaller, but I know that underneath the mask is just a face as confused as mine. Probably less dizzy and nauseous. I start bouncing up and down on my captor's shoulder as we run up the stairs, my headset forgotten at the bottom. We finally make it up to the second floor and I'm thrown onto the bed with a not so graceful landing, (thanks Mr. Captor), as the door is closed and locked and bolted behind us.

"We should be safe here," I hear the man wheeze, hands on his knees. I get over my temporary sickness and finally notice my "savior". Once black hair fading into white, wrinkly forehead from worry, bags under his eyes from stress…

"Soichiro?"

The stressed father looks up at the sound of his name, eyebrows creased. "How do you know my name? No. First things first. Who are you? How did you get in? Are you alone?"

"Uh…" my eyes shift around as I rack my brain for a logical lie. It's best to remain innocent and try not to make them suspicious of you. But if I do that, they'll be suspicious of me. My eyes land on a little golden statue in the room, the little man bending down on one knee, tiny sword pointed downward. "I am…my name…is, I…uh…don't…seem to…remember…" I lie. I get up slowly, walking over to the statue, knowing that Soichiro's eyes were trained on me and my actions. I pick up the statue and smile slightly. Hey, I can lie about my personality also right? "Have you met my new friend?" I ask, offering him the golden man. "I think we should call him…Stefano."

Soichiro's eyes widen and he moves slowly towards me. "Please, have a seat. You must be in shock," Soichiro says, leading me back down to the bed and sitting me down. "I would be too if I were in your position," he smiles softly.

"Position?" I ask, cradling Stefano in my hands.

"You were being attacked by that monster," Soichiro explains, crouching down in front of me. "I was too. So were the others-"

"Like the two chained together?" I asked, referring to L and Light.

"You've seen my son?" Soichiro yells, grabbing my arms tightly. I hold onto Stefano tightly as Soichiro squeezes my arms harder. "Where? Is-is he okay?"

I smiled slightly and nodded. "He's fine." Soichiro breathes a sigh of relief and lets go of my arms. I got off of the bed and walked towards the door, unbolting it. "I'll bring you to him."

"What about the monsters? What will we use to protect us?" Soichiro asks.

I shrug. "I have Stefano. What do you have?" I ask, opening the door, checking if the coast was clear. I stick my head back into the room and see Soichiro brandishing a lamp.

"What are you doing to Lamp?" I glared at the older man.

"W-w-well, there's nothing else-" Soichiro stuttered, withering under my crazy glare.

"…Fine. We'll take Lamp. If he tells us to do something, we do it, understood?"

Soichiro stared at me blankly before nodding uncertainly. I love playing the crazy person. Referencing all these things is fun!

"You break Lamp and Stefano and Mr. Chair will hurt you, but it won't be as bad as what I'll do to you," I warn, glaring one last time at Light's father before walking out the door and into the hallway, Soichiro at my heels, heading to the stairs.

I hope those three idiots are still in the third floor bedroom. If they aren't, they won't just have Ao or Midori trying to kill them.

"Lead us, Stefano," I order the golden statue as we walk forward.

"Yes. Now, don't make a noise," I say in a deeper voice.

"But-"

"What did I say about making a noise?" Stefano snaps. We make it to the landing of the second floor, at the top of the stairs leading to the first floor and the base leading to the third floor. "Now, this way," Stefano orders, as I point him up towards the third floor.

"How are you sure-" Soichiro asks.

"What did I say about making a noise!" Stefano yells, as I turn around and glare at Soichiro. "Now, up we go."

"Are you sure the monster won't find us here?" I ask Stefano as we climb the stairs slowly.

"Idiot, of course I'm sure," Stefano answers. We make it to the top and look around at the multiple rooms in the hallway. I hear talking coming from the right hallway. "They should be in that room," Stefano says, as I nudge him towards the last room at the end of the hall. As we slowly creep up to the room, I wink at the camera I've hidden in the ceiling. I put a finger over my lips, signaling to Soichiro to keep quiet. I put Stefano down and pick up the plant in the corner, walking back a few steps from the door.

"SSSSSCCCCCOOOOONNNNEESSSSSS!" I yell before charging at the door with the plant over my head, as soon as I'm about to make contact with the door, it swings open, revealing-

"Light! Ryuzaki! Watch out!" I hear Soichiro warn before I run into the two detectives, knocking them, myself, and my new enemy, Paulo the plant over.

"Ugh…I have to admit, that wasn't my best plan ever…" I mumble, my whole body hurting. I didn't feel like getting up because one, I'm hurt and can't get up, thus I need LifeAlert®, two, I feel like I'm lying on the warmest and softest bed ever, and three, someone's on top of me. I try to use my arms to push myself up, but they seem to have gotten numb.

"Ugh…Dad?"

"Light? Ryuzaki? Aizawa? Are you all okay?" Soichiro asks. Suddenly the bricks are lifted off of me and I start to feel my arms again.

"Well, I'm just peachy keen, thanks for asking," I grumble. I open my eyes to see L, Soichiro, and Aizawa standing around me, staring at me. On top of Light. I roll myself off of Light and stay on the floor as Light gets up to brush himself off.

"Where were you?" Light asks his father.

"I was hiding in-"

"The bathroom!" I giggled, getting off of the floor and flopping myself onto the bed.

"W-what? No! I was-"

"In the closet!"

"Let me finish!" Soichiro shouts, wiping off some of the sweat of the sheen on his forehead.

"Who's she?" Light asks, pointing to me.

"She's, uh—I… don't know. I rescued her from being attacked and we ran to a room, and it seems she's suffering from amnesia of some sort," Soichiro explains. L slumps over to me with Light following like an unwilling puppy, as both of them examine me.

"I don't think she's suffered from amnesia Yagami-san," L says.

"But she doesn't remember her name-"

"Have you not thought that could perhaps be lying?"

Oh shit.

L turns to me with his black eyes with matching eye bags and asks, "Why are you here?"

I fake a cough, giving me time to think. I guess it's time to put on Act #2. "Well, Mister letter number twelve of the alphabet, as you prefer to be called, my parents loved each other very much. To show that love they-"

"We don't mean _how_ you got here. We want to know _why_ you're here," Light demanded his (short) temper decreasing by the minute.

"Well, Light-kun, I'm pretty sure Panda-san here wants to know how I got here if you know what I mean. Maybe that'll satisfy his perverted needs," I rambled nonchalantly, (definitely) not noticing the slack jaws of everyone in the room. Suddenly, I feel my phone vibrating in my pocket. I see everyone snap out of their trance and notice the buzzing sound filling the room.

No! Stop ringing! Shut up! SHUT UP PHONE! WHAT DID I SAY ABOUT A NOISE?

"Do you hear that?" Aizawa asks.

"It sounds like…a-a phone?" Light asks as everyone turns to me, their accusatory glares burning holes as they stare at my pocket.

"RRRRRUUUUUUUNNNNNNNNN !" I shout, running out of the room brandishing the golden statue in front of me as I run down the hallway, the group nipping at my heels.

"Come back!"

"Let us use your phone!"

"NEVER!" I shout, going down the stairs three at a time, jumping towards the base of the second floor.

"Finish that story about your parents!"

"Ryuzaki!"

"Yes?"

"Now isn't for your perverseness to come out now!"

"As much as I know you would enjoy that Light-kun-"

"I would _not_ enjoy it!"

"That's not what you said last night…"

"Wait. Light, you told me you had a study group with friends to go to last night-"

"He studied, Yagami-san, but I'm pretty sure he didn't study any _subjects_ you knew."

"…Ryuzaki!"

"I didn't say that Light-kun."

"…"

Everyone stops in their tracks as we turn around to see Midori grinning at us at the base of the stairs.

"What time is it?" Midori asks us. "Rapin' TIME!"

"Save me!" I shout, jumping towards Midori forcing the green man to carry me piggy back style as we ran away from the group.

"We're coming, uh…whatever your name is!"

"I don't want to know what you're doing in your pants!" I shout as Midori and I race down the stairs, finally landing back in the foyer. "Run Midori run!" I shouted. We ran towards the basement door and slammed it open. "Go go go!" I ordered.

"They're coming!"

"Just go in and lock the door!"

Midori did as he was told as the task force group slammed into the basement door.

"Phew. We lost them." I sighed, wiping sweat off my brow. I slid off Midori as we descended down the stairs, as I opened the door to the camera room, I notice Midori stop in his tracks. "Wha-"

Midori held a finger to his lips. "Do you hear that?"

"What?" I asked, straining my ears. I hear some talking coming from outside the basement door then a loud slam.

"Again!" I hear from outside.

"NO!" I shout.

"What's going on?" Ao asks, standing up from his spot behind the desk.

"I-I don't know…" I attempt to explain, watching the door in horror. "I think they think I'm actually in danger…"

"Who are you talking to?" Midori asks, looking at me strangely.

"Ah-"

"We've come for you!" I hear someone yell from the top of the stairs.

"Go, go, go!" I yell at both Oni's, pushing them inside the camera room, as I tried to lock and close the door behind me. I was about to close the door just as a strong hand stopped the door.

"Wait, what's all this?" L peeps inside, pushing the door open as I stand aside, since it was impossible for them not to see.

"It looks…like a surveillance room…" Light answers, as the Task Force looks around.

"I can explain," I nervously say, putting my hands in front of me. I feel something cool click around my wrist and I see myself chained to L, who's chained to Light, who's chained to Midori. "What? Are we preparing for an orgy or something, Ryuzaki?" I ask, as Light's and Soichiro's face heat up.

"No…Now let's see who's behind this mask…" L turns from me to Midori. L grabs a fistful of Midori's mask and lifts it up to reveal-

"Matsuda?" Every one exclaims, staring at the young task force member who's currently chained to Light.

"Uh, hey guys…" Matsuda sheepishly greets, scratching the back of his head nervously.

"Okay, I'm confused. What's going on here?" Light asks, switching from looking at me to Matsuda.

"Well, you see-"

"It's a prank! YOU JUST GOT PRANKED!" I yell, shooting Matsuda a quick warning look about spilling the whole operation before smiling cheerfully at the rest of the task force.

"It's…a…prank?" Aizawa asks, fists at his side trembling.

"…Yes?" I answer, inching away from Aizawa slowly.

"This whole…f-ing thing…is…a…prank? Aizawa asks, his slow menacing steps scaring me. As if sensing the atmosphere, go figure, Soichiro takes Aizawa outside the camera room before he explodes. At me.

"If this is a prank, where's Misa-Misa?" L asks.

"Shiro? Uh…." I look around at the group for the bubbly blonde. "Yeah…where is, she?"

"That's what I was going to tell you," Ao pops up.

"Tell me what?"

"Well…you see…" Ao fidgets with his fingers before whispering in my ear.

"Who is she talking to, Matsuda?" Light whispers to Matsuda. Matsuda shrugs as he and the others watch me.

"She's always been doing that. I think it's her imaginary friend."

"It's quite normal for an eight year old to have an imaginary friend, Matsuda," L interjects.

"Uh, Ryuzaki? She's not eight…" Matsuda replies.

"How old is she?" Light asks, turning to Matsuda. Matsuda whispers in his ear as L leans in to eavesdrop.

"No, really." Light joked. Matsuda shrugged again, as the L duo gave a disbelieving glance.

"WHAT DO YOU MEAN SHE WAS KIDNAPPED?" I shout.

0o0o0o0o0o0o0o0o0

Upcoming Part 2- The Great Airhead Search of Misa Amane

**0o0o0o0o0o0o0o0o0o0**

**Longest. Chapter. I. Have. Ever. Written. 14 Pages. Not including Author's Note.**

**WHAATTTT!**

***smacked on head by paper megaphone* That was poor ACTING! :O**

**Ohonononon! Yes! It's the totally wonderful and awesome me! Fusosososo!~**

**Audience: …**

***cough* ahem. Yes, well, Hetalia has influenced me too much *cough*Bad Friends Trio*cough*. But! I have returned for today with a VERY LATE APRIL's Fool's One-shot for you all! Happy Late Earth Day! If, I have any one left... This was supposed to be published ON April Fool's (April's Fools? Fools of April? 0_o), but I wasn't able to finish it on time…so I decided to post it today! :D**

**I may or may not apologize for leaving everyone for SOOOOOOO Long. **

**Hint: I am.**

**But, I'm trying to finish up Let's Match U! Damn you writers' BLOCK! Any ideas, (really. ANY ideas are welcome). I'm trying to go out with a bang here after all. Hell, I'll write aliens popping out of the sky or Berry signing up all the male contestants for a Victoria's Secret Fashion show…well now. That doesn't sound like that bad of an idea now, does it? *insert creepy smile here* hehehe…**

**Disclaimer: I don't own Death Note. If I did, well…ahem…mwahaha… Or Ao Oni. If you get scared shitless by Ao Oni, you'll never handle Amnesia. Really. Or Cry of Fear. Or Afraid of Monsters. NOPE!**

**Birthday wish: Get on TV Tropes. **

**Don't forget to review!**

**Adieu!~**


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